I needed to remind myself of THIS today and I need to EVERYDAY! Life is so busy, often feels so chaotic. As I sit this morning, the boys in school, the sounds of Max in his swing napping...I realize I need to sit in quiet more. Focus on having Quiet time in the morning, not checking facebook. Quiet time at bedtime often ends up with me asleep, glasses on, reading...Scott coming to bed and slipping my glasses off and kissing me goodnight.
I long for the calm and peace of the country, the lazy days of summer, the quiet of the boys playing HAPPILY...while we don't live in the country, and I often wish we did, I am needing to be content with where we are, with the quiet we can make this house be wherever it is located. While I know the reality of a QUIET house with 4 boys, seems a lofty goal, it isn't the QUIET I want as much as the PEACE of brothers.
My day ALWAYS goes better if I start the morning off in prayer and quiet...the reality of my life right now is a tired Momma, up in the night with a sweet baby boy nursing and holding my fingers...I don't want to lose sight of the beauty of those moments with him. But I still need to make a conscious effort, for my sake and for our boys, that they deserve a Mom who has prayed before she has risen. A Proverbs 31 Mom and wife.
Oh I pray I can be that kind of a Mom...that kind of a wife...it truly is my hearts desire. Why do I allow the little messes, the lack of organization, the laundry, the dishes...why do those frustrations often outweigh my hearts desire?
I want this too. I don't know if I'll ever get there.
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