Back to School Thoughts

School starts tomorrow for our boys, I always have mixed feelings this time of year.  The teacher part of me LOVES the beginning of school, the newness of a classroom of kids, your lockers, your desks, school supplies...new markers and crayons.  Everything neatly labeled, oh how I LOVE anything labeled.  Love back to school shopping, going through closets and seeing what fits and what doesn't.  Buying new shoes.  Making sure backpacks are good to go.  I LOVE that part of school. 

 The Mom side of me loves the idea of routines again for everyone, the idea of the boys learning more and growing their brains.  The selfish and honest Mom side of me loves a little less chaos in my days, and a little more time at home. (at least between the hours of 8:30-2:30) There is a side of me too that is sad that the boys are going back, I love the lack of routine of summer in a lot of ways.  I love the spontaneity of summer.  I love seeing the boys so much, I love their help with Max and house stuff.  I will miss them.  My heart aches for them to have stress again, I know the beginning of school brings about a lot of anxiety for our boys...some boys more than others.  The lists that run through their minds of the "to do's" and tests coming up, and projects...all the stuff they have to keep track of.  I don't like for them to feel that stress.  It makes me sad for them.  I love their carefree summers.  

So today I am a ball of mixed emotions...we leave in an hour to drop off supplies and meet their teachers, who we already know.  :)  But I ALWAYS get choked up at meet the teacher.  ALWAYS...almost worse than the first day of school.  It's the anticipation of it all, and the unknown of it all.  We have been praying for their teachers and for the classrooms.  And I know our God hears those prayers, and I know my anxiousness is probably not real pleasing to Him.  I have a hard time letting go and letting Him...and the irony is, they are HIS children and He loves them so much more than I ever could.  

This afternoon, if the rain clears, we will head to the pool for a few last summer hours of fun!  And the plan is to go with my good friend Stephanie, and her kids.  Steph is the widow of our dear friend Gailen.  She has been heavy on my mind this week, while I worry and think about back to school...she is facing SO much more and I know with school starting and her kids now gone all day, she will go home to a VERY quiet house...and I think her grieving will really begin.   Gailen died at the very beginning of summer and I know she has been non stop with the kids all summer long.    So if you think of it, would you pray for her?  And pray for their kids as they won't have their Dad there in the morning to wish them off to school and pray with them....